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Practicing
the Cross
September
5, 2004 Homily
Fr.
George Smiga
Luke
14:25-33
“Whoever
does not take up their cross and follow me cannot be my disciple.”
These are the words of Jesus and we are called to obey them.
But, what is most difficult in Jesus' command is not carrying
our cross, but bearing it while still being open to life.
The greatest challenge for a disciple is not picking up the
cross, but carrying it and still being a joyful and positive
person.
In
a real sense, we do not have a choice whether we are going
to carry our crosses or not. We do not seek our crosses. They
just come to us. We turn a corner in our life and suddenly
we realize, “I'm going to have to deal with sickness, or divorce,
or rejection, or unemployment.” All of us would rather avoid
these troubles, but they come to us and we have no choice
but to take them up and carry them. But, what we can choose
is how we carry them. We can choose to let our crosses
absorb all of our energy and joy, or carry them and at the
same time remain open to life.
Betty
was a remarkable woman that I came to know while serving in
a previous parish. She was in her forties with two boys in
grade school and a loving husband. Betty had the worst arthritis
of any person I had ever seen. Her hands were like gnarled
fists. She could, only with the greatest difficulty, hold
anything. The arthritis certainly caused her considerable
pain, but she never complained. She remained involved in our
parish life and whenever she would come to a parish meeting
she always greeted everyone with a broad and sincere smile.
One
day I questioned her about her positive attitude. “Betty,”
I said, “how can you be so happy with your arthritis?” She
smiled at me and she said, “It's the only way I can be happy.
I don't have the choice of being happy without my arthritis.
The doctors tell me it is here to stay. Therefore, my only
choice is to be happy with the arthritis or to be depressed
with the arthritis. Several years ago, I decided to try for
happiness.”
“It
can't be easy,” I said. “No, it's not easy at all,” she replied.
“But I try to see it as a kind of discipline, as a kind of
practice.” “Discipline? Practice? What do you mean?” “Well,
I look at it this way, George,” she said, “This arthritis
causes me pain, but it is not fatal. God willing, I still
have many years to live. And there is a lot of good in my
life. I have a loving husband. I have great children, good
friends, nice hobbies, a parish that I care for. So, I decided
to practice the discipline of focusing on what is good in
my life rather than what is wrong.
“Every
morning that I get up, the first thing that I feel is the
pain in my hands. It cries out to me for all of my attention,
all of my energy. I try to establish the discipline of refusing
to feed it. Instead of thinking of my pain, I try to get up
from my bed and go to the window and appreciate the sunshine
in my back yard. As I wake up my boys, I choose to tell them
that I love them and to appreciate how beautiful they are.
As I look forward to my day, I try to anticipate the enjoyable
moments that are to come. I try to look forward to a lunch
with a friend or a walk in the park. I try to develop the
discipline of asking myself ‘Who needs me today?' and then
to call a friend who is struggling or to consciously speak
a kind word to my husband as he comes home from a difficult
day.
“What
I find is that when I develop this discipline, when I choose
to appreciate, to listen, to give, I put goodness in the center
of my life. And that goodness gives me joy, even with the
pain that is still in my hands.”
Betty
continued, “this discipline is wonderful practice, because
I know that there are greater burdens to come. I know that
one day I am going to grieve the loss of someone I love deeply
or have to face a sickness that will lead to my own death.
When those greater burdens come, I believe that I will be
able to deal with them better because I have practiced being
joyful with my arthritis.”
Betty
remains for me one of the greatest examples of what it means
to take up your cross and follow after Jesus. There is nothing
wrong with following her example. We can use the troubles
of today to practice for the bigger troubles that are likely
to come. There is nothing wrong with taking our present frustrations,
and disappointments, and burdens and using them to build the
discipline of choosing life. There is an advantage in using
those disappointments to develop the skill of focusing in
on what is good. The gospel today invites us to carry our
cross without letting it crush us, to bear our pain and at
the same time embrace the joy and the beauty of living.
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